Memories.

I’ve got that sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. The one I get when I see pictures of you. Pictures of you and me. Pictures of your memories I missed out on. I get the sick feeling looking at them and knowing you’re no where near me.

The feeling that leaves my stomach in knots and sends chills down my spine. Wishing I spent more time with you while I could. I know that I cannot now. You are so far away and never coming back.

I won’t let you go though. I’m not ready for you to leave. In my head you’re still here. I’ll still see your smiling face looking at me next time I call you up and see you. I’ll still hear your voice on the other line of the phone sending an instant relief over me.

I wish I could believe you’re gone. So it wouldn’t hurt as bad. But I don’t believe I will ever truly tell myself you’re gone.

Mainly because, in reality, you’re not gone. You’re still here in those memories I hold so dear.

Although I wish I was holding you next to me, I know that can never be.

So here is to you. To let you know I’ll never forget you. I never stop seeing you in every move I make in my life.

You made an impact in my life, and I’ll make you be remembered in everyone I encounter because every movement I make, there is a part of you in me.

So hello, I still miss you. And that’s not about to change.