Thank You.

It isn’t said enough these days.

But I’m saying it now. Better late than never, I suppose.

I always feel bad because I don’t say thank you, or I love you enough. I know I don’t say it enough. Yet I can never bring myself to say it more.

I always want to say I love you and to drive safe before my dad leaves for work, but I don’t.

I always want to tell my mom the same, but I don’t.

I always want to say thank you for being there. Even when we argue a lot, when we don’t get along. Thank you for being my rock when I cry.

Even when you don’t believe me, thank you thinking of what could have happened.

Even when you tell me I can’t go somewhere, thank you for caring enough to keep me from possible harm, even if there wasn’t any.

I always want to talk to friends, or my boyfriend everyday just to make sure they’re okay.

But I don’t.

I always feel like such a bother to everyone. I feel like I am just going to annoy them.

I’m afraid, I’ll feel that way and miss my last chance to talk to them. I’m afraid I’ll miss my last chance to say I love you.

I’m afraid of it because it has happened.

I was too afraid of planes, so I missed out on getting to know you better.

I didn’t feel like hanging out with you when you asked and now I still can’t believe you’re gone.

I went home to sleep and I accidentally overslept. I didn’t get to tell you one last time how beautiful I thought, and still think, you are, nor did I get to tell you I see you as a second mom, I see your family as a second family. If only I had stayed up four more hours, I could have.

I never took into consideration to thank you for what you did to teach students the meaning of Veteran’s Day. I just saw it as another thing to get me out of class. I never went back and thanked you for allowing me to partake in the human flag. Nor did I tell you how funny I thought you were. Now here I am, planning on joining the military, and the person who was one of the biggest military supporters in my middle school left us just last month. I’m sorry I never thanked you. I’m sorry I couldn’t stay the whole service.

Even the simplest things people have done in my life have helped shape and mold who I am today. And I more than likely never thanked them, and I have now missed my chance and I really wish I hadn’t.

But, alas, I’m human and I have missed these opportunities, no turning back. I will miss many more opportunities, and I’ll regret those, but I can’t change that.

I’ll do my best, but I know me, and I know, I’ll just slip into my old daily habits.

So when I forget, just know, I really am thankful and I do love you.

Even if sometimes I really don’t show it.

Give me time, it’ll come.

Even if it comes too late.